Thanks again to everyone for their wonderful comments! I'm sorry I can't keep up with the demand for updates! ;)
The kids went back to the orphanage Sunday night, which was beyond difficult for us all. Katya has this habit of hiding sadness so as to not make other people sad, and she insists that no one else be sad so that she doesn't get sad. So when Igor got here, she got involuntarily despondent and teary eyed, then tried to hide it. We asked her why she was sad, and she responded defensively (in Russian) "I'm NOT sad." She turned away to wipe her eyes, but I saw her anyway.
As soon as we're with them, we are as happy as can be. As soon as they're gone, we're immediately extremely upset. It's not like the fun and happiness lasts after they're gone. The spirit and energy they have - it leaves with them.
They were with us again Tuesday afternoon for a few hours. We went to McDonald's, then came back to the apartment where they immediately consumed a dozen eggs, a half of a huge bar of dark chocolate, a package of ham, and probably some bread too. You'd think they never get to eat. I know they eat, but I'm sure it's different when you have choice of food that you LIKE. I told Jason it would be like having to live on that gloop they ate in the Matrix, and then when you have a chance to eat a hot dog, you're going to eat 10 hot dogs.
Although today we stopped at Nastja's orphanage to grab some more clothes for her, and the caretaker fed us coffee, tea, and this apple danish thing, and cookies. It was good.
Then we went ice skating, which is an outdoor rink right next to our apartment. That's always a lot of fun, and we get fought over (particularly Jason since he's such a good skater) to be skated with.
All three kids have just been so wonderful. Nastja is very sweet, always telling us how much she loves us and is happy she's going to America with us. She is also picking up some English because we make her repeat objects and other phrases. We'll say things in Russian and then English and have her repeat it. Like she'll go "uh uh uh Mama - cle-eb, pajaloosta?" and I'll say "da, adeen cle-eb... (one bread) Now say 'Mama, may I have BREAD PLEASE' ", and she'll repeat it.
She also LOVES to be hugged and kissed. So with all three kids we spend a lot of time randomly going up to them, squeezing them, kissing their face and telling them we love them.
Wednesday afternoon we spent doing the rest of Nastja's exit paperwork. We picked up her passport, after going to the store to buy a cake for the passport lady for doing her passport in 2 days instead of the "up to one month" that is officially the wait time. Then we went to a translator lady to pick up the translation of our court documents. Then we went to the US embassy and finally got to speak to an American for a change! We filled out the forms for her immigrant visa, and we go back Friday to pick that up. Then everything is done.
We've learned that doing the processes here are basically a wait and see type thing. Every step of the way we have no idea when something is getting done, and a vague idea of where Igor is taking us the next day when he comes to pick us up. There is no point in asking, we just follow and do. Igor always seems to be in a hurry, too, and doesn't know what to do with himself if has to sit still for awhile. We went to a restaurant yesterday for an hour because we had time to kill before the Embassy appointment. And he literally stood by the table looking around and pacing for 10 minutes before he finally sat. He also rushes ahead all the time, leaving us behind to figure out which way he went. It's become almost a game. Where's Igor?
Now to answer your questions about Katya and Roman's documents. We learned more reasons why suddenly their citizenship was a problem. Here's the explanation:
The Hague convention covers international relations among many countries. Some countries are a party to it and some aren't. The US is as of 4/1/08, Estonia has been for years, and from what I can tell Russia recently became part of it. It changes some of the adoption processes if you adopt from a Hague country vs. a non-Hague country. The paperwork is more regulated (meaning it is more difficult). Prior to 4/1/08, people could do paperwork processes with all countries as if they were non-Hague, because the US was not a Hague country. But after that, the paperwork had to be streamlined along with the Hague requirements, which has caused a lot of people issues with their adoptions. Not so much us, though, because we had our immigration paperwork done before 4/1.
But, because of the Hague rules between Estonia and Russia, there are laws that must be followed in cases where there are children of another citizenship available for adoption. This is world-wide rule with the Hague convention. It says that the adoptees must have permission from the country of their citizenship in order to be adopted.
There is also a contract between Russia and Estonia regarding all international relationships between them, and there are a couple paragraphs within that contract about adoption. It also says that if there is an orphan of the other country's citizenship living within the opposite country, the country of citizenship must release the child officially for adoption.
From what we can tell either Russia recently became party to the Hague, which caused this to now be more of a followed law than in the past, or no one knew of these laws until recently when a couple cases were about to go to court and all the documents and laws are reviewed in preparation for court. Then it was seen that Katya and Roman (along with a couple kids being adopted to Sweden, and several Estonian domestic adoption cases) need this letter from Russia to avoid international conflict for not following 1) the Hague regulations and 2) the Russia/Estonian contract.
It does not matter that they were born in Estonia and have lived here their whole lives. It's just the law. They have Russian citizenship. They have to be released by Russia. It doesn't matter if they had a lawyer. Estonia is following international laws by asking for permission. It's still dumb, but it's just the way it is.
We did see the letter that went to the MOE. It states something like "In accordance with the Hague Convention article xyz paragraph 123, we are requesting approval for bla bla bla". So that gives us more reason to think that Russia will have no problem doing this.
Lastly, the only other update I have is that Diana talked to Dmitry and said that his contact at the MOE said that they have the request, they know what it's about, they understand what they have to do, and as soon as they get done with emergencies from just having reopened after a 2 week close, then they'll get to it. So it does sound like they have no problem doing it. We just don't know when and we don't have any official confirmation to ease our minds. So we just have to wait and see, true to the formula of adoption.
At least now we know personally that adoptions can and do go smoothly in Estonia! Kersti (at the MSA here in Estonia) also said that once they get that letter, then everything is good to go. They will likely need a different immigration process than a stateless or Estonian child would have, so they are working on the details of that now. But there isn't anything else that stands in the way. Still, since the Estonians have no idea how to deal with this, they are naturally skeptical, which has been discouraging. We have to remind ourselves that they don't know how to take care of this because it's never happened before, and they themselves don't have contacts at the MOE. That is why Diana and Dmitry are helping.
That's the best explanation I can give for now! Of course it's hard to get any info because of all the people here Kersti speaks the best English, and even then sometimes she can't find the right word. So we hear conflicting information, confusing information, and sometimes just information in Russian. LOL
Per suggestions, from now on until we are home I'll probably just write short updates so I can actually get them posted. I have no time, except while everyone else sleeps, to be on the computer. So now that I've gotten to tell you guys all these details, the rest will be probably short and sweet till we go home.
Jason wants to leave early since we'll be done with the papers early. I don't know if we will yet. We're just sick of being here, and we can't really see the kids much during the week anyway. I'll keep you posted.
Sorry again for taking so long to update you all!! Thanks for patience. ;)
Love,
Molly
Tuesday, January 27, 2009
Saturday, January 24, 2009
Life and love
To the faithful and pestering fans:
OK fine! I'll write, even though I'm exhausted and tired and sleepy. So I'm sorry if I repeat myself repeat myself.
Last night we stayed up really late with the kids, playing games and talking on the online translator. Anja (Nastja's 16 year old sister) came over last night for the weekend also. She is so sweet and so happy for Nastja.
This morning we got up early to go to the waterpark before Anna (Anja's current caregiver, Roman and Katya's former caregiver) came over to take us to this festival in a park in Tallinn. So we are all tired and on about 4 hours of sleep.
We had a GREAT day. Roman and Katya have been perfect. From the moment we picked them up and hugged them both tightly, both of us doing everything we could to keep ourselves together, they just picked up where they left off when we left. There is nothing that has changed, which means Jason's fears were over nothing. They just fit so perfectly with us, their personalities. And with Nastja too. We just can't imagine our family without them. We HAVE to get good news before we leave or I think we just might both have nervous breakdowns. Imagine having to turn your kids over to someone you don't know, where they hate living, and not know when you'll ever see them again. It's a pain that no one should have to even consider, and so far I try not to think about it because it is just too difficult. Neither of us ever cry, but if it crosses our mind, crying is all we do. The kids keep having to console us. They even told us not to worry, that even if we are apart they love us still and that they are happy knowing they have parents who love them, even if we are not together. That reaffirmed to us that even if we keep their hopes up for however long, months on end, that we are doing what is best for them to keep their hopes up.
Their new director and some of the people at the MSA feel differently, though. If it wasn't for Anna, I think they would discourage us visiting them at all. Kersti (MSA) told us on Thursday that they personally would not tell them that things will work out, because they do not know that for sure, and they don't want them to get their hopes up. But in this case, it is apparently too late. We said yes, it was already too late when we met them in May and found out the problem in September. We were already family. And that at this point, it is better for the kids to have hope than to have doubts. Kersti agreed with that.
The new director asked to meet us before they came with us this weekend. Of course we were charming as always ;) so that was no problem. But at first they said ehhh I don't know maybe not - about having them after school during the week. Anna talked to them and arranged to bring them to us most days, on her DAYS OFF. There are just so many loving people helping us, we're so grateful that we're not completely surrounded by problems and people who don't care.
So Katya and Roman go back to the orphanage tomorrow night and will be here Tuesday afternoon/evening and Wednesday afternoon/evening, and then on Friday for the weekend again. Same for the week after and then we leave on Thursday the 5th.
Anja is still here (until tomorrow when Katya and Roman go back to the orphanage also) and has been wonderful. She is 16 as of November. Anna (caretaker) was here most of the day also and took us to a festival in the park. She spoke to me at length, asking me if we would want to take Anja also, because she is wonderful and would love a family like ours. I agreed that we think she is wonderful, I told her that I didn't think it was allowed to adopt children of that age to America because she is 16. But we would do what we can for her as far as visiting or staying with us if she could come to America another way. Anja had already said she would try to get permission to visit us in the summer after her graduation.
We can't afford to adopt anymore kids after K&R, anyway, and in talking about age I said it might be weird that I'm only 12 years older than her. LOL Turns out her bio mom is only 35, with 6 kids (including Nastja and Anja, Vlad the 12 year old boy, and 3 babies, all but the youngest baby in the orphanages). But we would do whatever we could for Anja. She is very special.
Later, Anja commented that dinner together with all of us at the apartment (at the table, complete with prayer) was very special. She started crying and told us that she thinks that we are the best parents in the world, that she was wondering earlier why God would allow her to live such a life, with a mother who doesn't love her, and that she is so glad that her sister will be with us and be loved. And that she herself is happy when she is with us. It made us so sad for her. She acts very adult-like, sometimes we forget that she is 16. But then we could see how everything effects her too, even as a mature person. Now we feel like we have the biggest family of kids that live in another country. LOL We told Anja that now that we are Nastja's parents, she is also family and she now will always have a family who loves her. She was very happy to hear that, I think. She is also always very appreciative of everything. She thanked us many times for the excellent day and every small thing we do for her. She said where they live is very strict and even with family rules this is so much better, being with us. It sounds like even though the orphanage has loving caregivers and it is a safe place to live, they go without a lot of life's necessities. Being really loved, for instance. Being treated individually as appreciated and enjoyed. It's just heartbreaking.
Tomorrow we're going to the waterpark again. I am going to talk to Anja more about what she said about God. It will be interesting to see where that conversation goes.
Anyway, that's the update!
And finally, here are a couple pictures I got uploaded and exported to JPEG format. It takes forever, so sorry it's taking forever.
:)
Love,
Molly
Thursday, January 22, 2009
Finally parents!
Hi again!!
Thanks, Rachael, for posting a comment for everyone on the last post. And thank you to everyone else who responded to my text message with congratulations.
To the rest of you - here's the official word: Nastja is now our daughter! WOOHOOOOO!!!!!!! We are FINALLY parents. :)))))
After a very stressful and scary day, wondering what court would be like, it came down to basically what I logically expected. We were picked up by Igor, then we picked up a lady from Tallinn City social affairs (like the MSA but for the region instead of the whole country), and met Kersti from MSA at the courthouse. We were a half hour early to the court house, so we had time to talk to the lady from the city social affairs. She was really nice and knew a good bit of English. She could see that Nastja was already affectionate to us and commented on how she likes us already. At the time Nastja was holding my hand and wrapping her arm around my waist.
We went into the court room and sat down next to Kersti so she could translate. The judge spoke no English. We went through some formalities of our rights to see certain papers, ask questions, etc., and then we started the official process of the hearing. She asked for clarification on something Jason wrote in our documents, which made Jason just about have a heart attack right there on the spot. Turns out it was just that she wanted to know, for the official documents that she would write, whether she should list "Weehawken NJ" or just "New Jersey" as his place of birth because his passport says one and his birth certificate says the other. Whew! She had one other similar question. I think it was confirming the spelling of our last name. Then she asked if the adoption had the approval of the lady at the city social affairs, and she said yes - as long as we make sure Nastja stays in contact with her brother and sister in Estonia. Then the judge said if we have time, we can wait in the hallway for 15 minutes for her decision in writing. We laughed and said of course we'll wait. So about 40 minutes later (again Jason about to pass out from anxiety) the court clerk came out and gave a paper to Jason to sign. It was a paper saying that he, as the head of the family, is receiving the court decision in writing. So when Kersti told us that's what he was signing, we asked at the same time "What IS the decision???" She calmly turned to the last page and read us the last couple paragraphs, keeping us in suspense. "It says that you... Jason... and you... Molly... petitioned to adopt Nastja... and because of all of your documents and the review and thought by the judge, it is considered in the best interest of the child that the adoption be... approved." Wow - what a big sigh! She hugged us and said congratulations, then explained it to Nastja. I'm not sure if she really understood till then what we were exactly doing at court. So then when Kersti told her, Nastja smiled really big and hugged us both very tightly for several seconds. She was very happy.
Incidentally, though children only over 10 years old are required to be asked if they want to be adopted by the family, the judge asked Nastja anyway. I think because the lady from city social affairs said that she already behaved affectionately toward us, that the judge was only curious what Nastja would say. Of course she nodded and smiled when the judge asked, then she leaned on my shoulder and giggled a little. So cute.
We took Nastja to McDonald's to celebrate, then bought ice cream at the grocery store. Now I hear Nastja barking at Jason like a dog and pretending to bite him. I guess I should go train them both. ;)
Anyway, thank you all for your warm wishes, support and happiness for us. We're so glad something finally goes well!
Tomorrow we start the immigration (passports, etc.) stuff and go pick up Katya and Roman. More then!!
Love,
Molly
Thanks, Rachael, for posting a comment for everyone on the last post. And thank you to everyone else who responded to my text message with congratulations.
To the rest of you - here's the official word: Nastja is now our daughter! WOOHOOOOO!!!!!!! We are FINALLY parents. :)))))
After a very stressful and scary day, wondering what court would be like, it came down to basically what I logically expected. We were picked up by Igor, then we picked up a lady from Tallinn City social affairs (like the MSA but for the region instead of the whole country), and met Kersti from MSA at the courthouse. We were a half hour early to the court house, so we had time to talk to the lady from the city social affairs. She was really nice and knew a good bit of English. She could see that Nastja was already affectionate to us and commented on how she likes us already. At the time Nastja was holding my hand and wrapping her arm around my waist.
We went into the court room and sat down next to Kersti so she could translate. The judge spoke no English. We went through some formalities of our rights to see certain papers, ask questions, etc., and then we started the official process of the hearing. She asked for clarification on something Jason wrote in our documents, which made Jason just about have a heart attack right there on the spot. Turns out it was just that she wanted to know, for the official documents that she would write, whether she should list "Weehawken NJ" or just "New Jersey" as his place of birth because his passport says one and his birth certificate says the other. Whew! She had one other similar question. I think it was confirming the spelling of our last name. Then she asked if the adoption had the approval of the lady at the city social affairs, and she said yes - as long as we make sure Nastja stays in contact with her brother and sister in Estonia. Then the judge said if we have time, we can wait in the hallway for 15 minutes for her decision in writing. We laughed and said of course we'll wait. So about 40 minutes later (again Jason about to pass out from anxiety) the court clerk came out and gave a paper to Jason to sign. It was a paper saying that he, as the head of the family, is receiving the court decision in writing. So when Kersti told us that's what he was signing, we asked at the same time "What IS the decision???" She calmly turned to the last page and read us the last couple paragraphs, keeping us in suspense. "It says that you... Jason... and you... Molly... petitioned to adopt Nastja... and because of all of your documents and the review and thought by the judge, it is considered in the best interest of the child that the adoption be... approved." Wow - what a big sigh! She hugged us and said congratulations, then explained it to Nastja. I'm not sure if she really understood till then what we were exactly doing at court. So then when Kersti told her, Nastja smiled really big and hugged us both very tightly for several seconds. She was very happy.
Incidentally, though children only over 10 years old are required to be asked if they want to be adopted by the family, the judge asked Nastja anyway. I think because the lady from city social affairs said that she already behaved affectionately toward us, that the judge was only curious what Nastja would say. Of course she nodded and smiled when the judge asked, then she leaned on my shoulder and giggled a little. So cute.
We took Nastja to McDonald's to celebrate, then bought ice cream at the grocery store. Now I hear Nastja barking at Jason like a dog and pretending to bite him. I guess I should go train them both. ;)
Anyway, thank you all for your warm wishes, support and happiness for us. We're so glad something finally goes well!
Tomorrow we start the immigration (passports, etc.) stuff and go pick up Katya and Roman. More then!!
Love,
Molly
Too busy to title this one. :)
Hey! Right when I was about to start typing about yesterday, Nastja (as she informed us of the correct spelling of her shortened name. No "i".) woke up and didn't want to miss out on whatever we were doing. So since she was looking over my shoulder I opted to talk to her on the translator instead. So now it's almost lunch time, after eating breakfast, showering and playing a couple games.
Yesterday we picked Nastja up from the orphanage after she got out of school. We couldn't get her sooner because the director said yesterday would be her last day. It turned out to be good that we couldn't get her sooner because the power went out. Jason insisted on bringing our blender with us, and apparently our adapter for the plugs here isn't working right so the blender sparked and turned off the power in the whole apartment. The breakers were all fine, so it must've been a main breaker somewhere else in the building. Once a guy game and flipped it, all was fine.
Katya and Roman will be with us after school tomorrow. We have to wait until after court to get them because it's just too hectic and no one will be available to watch them while we're in the courtroom. Since they had chicken pox and were out of school for 2 weeks, they can't be out of school again. So we will have them on the weekends and after school during the week.
Everything is going great with Nastja. She is as sweet as can be and we just love her! She is a very affectionate girl, but not immediately. So she has a good balance. She's a little demanding at times (playfully insisting on things, sort of how Sasha was), but not terribly. I'm sure it might get worse the more comfortable she gets. I guess you can't avoid pouting completely! I hate that. But the more comfortable we get, the more we'll say "no" to things! Especially after court is over and there's no chance of her having a temper tantrum right before we get there. But so far when we've said no to something she just playfully glared at us for a second and then laughed.
Yesterday after we got to the orphanage we met her sister Anya again. She knows some English, so we talked to her for awhile. She also went back with us to the apartment and out for pizza. She's really sweet. Very self sufficient and very adult-like. She will be spending the night here (at our invitation), along with Katya, Roman and Nastja of course, tomorrow night.
Nastja has a habit of calling me by my name for some reason. She usually calls Jason "Papa" but sometimes forgets and calls him by his name too. She always referred to me as Molly until after Anya went home and I started to correct her. Now she calls me Mama or Mommy most of the time, and if she forgets she corrects herself. I think it must be because her bio mom is still around. It's probably weird for her at first. So I suggested "Mommy" since not only do I like it better than Mama, it probably is a little different than what she calls her bio mom.
We did find out that their baby half siblings might be going to another family in PA. That would be awesome so Nastja can stay in contact with them! Also Anya said she'd like to visit the US in the future, maybe even get a student visa. I hope so, that would be really nice.
We never know what's going to happen here till it happens, so all I know is that in about a half hour Igor is picking us up to go to court. After that- who knows! We know the judge has 3 days to generate the official written decision. They usually do it the same day unless they're really busy. Technically it's for them to think about the decision, but that better not happen to us after all this! We don't need to stress the whole weekend about what the judge will say. Diana said they usually do the paper right away though. As soon as possible, I'll text someone so everyone knows. Then I'll write on the blog more details when I get time.
Stay tuned! :)
Love,
Molly
PS- I will get pictures uploaded eventually. This post took 4 times at the computer because I kept being interrupted!
Yesterday we picked Nastja up from the orphanage after she got out of school. We couldn't get her sooner because the director said yesterday would be her last day. It turned out to be good that we couldn't get her sooner because the power went out. Jason insisted on bringing our blender with us, and apparently our adapter for the plugs here isn't working right so the blender sparked and turned off the power in the whole apartment. The breakers were all fine, so it must've been a main breaker somewhere else in the building. Once a guy game and flipped it, all was fine.
Katya and Roman will be with us after school tomorrow. We have to wait until after court to get them because it's just too hectic and no one will be available to watch them while we're in the courtroom. Since they had chicken pox and were out of school for 2 weeks, they can't be out of school again. So we will have them on the weekends and after school during the week.
Everything is going great with Nastja. She is as sweet as can be and we just love her! She is a very affectionate girl, but not immediately. So she has a good balance. She's a little demanding at times (playfully insisting on things, sort of how Sasha was), but not terribly. I'm sure it might get worse the more comfortable she gets. I guess you can't avoid pouting completely! I hate that. But the more comfortable we get, the more we'll say "no" to things! Especially after court is over and there's no chance of her having a temper tantrum right before we get there. But so far when we've said no to something she just playfully glared at us for a second and then laughed.
Yesterday after we got to the orphanage we met her sister Anya again. She knows some English, so we talked to her for awhile. She also went back with us to the apartment and out for pizza. She's really sweet. Very self sufficient and very adult-like. She will be spending the night here (at our invitation), along with Katya, Roman and Nastja of course, tomorrow night.
Nastja has a habit of calling me by my name for some reason. She usually calls Jason "Papa" but sometimes forgets and calls him by his name too. She always referred to me as Molly until after Anya went home and I started to correct her. Now she calls me Mama or Mommy most of the time, and if she forgets she corrects herself. I think it must be because her bio mom is still around. It's probably weird for her at first. So I suggested "Mommy" since not only do I like it better than Mama, it probably is a little different than what she calls her bio mom.
We did find out that their baby half siblings might be going to another family in PA. That would be awesome so Nastja can stay in contact with them! Also Anya said she'd like to visit the US in the future, maybe even get a student visa. I hope so, that would be really nice.
We never know what's going to happen here till it happens, so all I know is that in about a half hour Igor is picking us up to go to court. After that- who knows! We know the judge has 3 days to generate the official written decision. They usually do it the same day unless they're really busy. Technically it's for them to think about the decision, but that better not happen to us after all this! We don't need to stress the whole weekend about what the judge will say. Diana said they usually do the paper right away though. As soon as possible, I'll text someone so everyone knows. Then I'll write on the blog more details when I get time.
Stay tuned! :)
Love,
Molly
PS- I will get pictures uploaded eventually. This post took 4 times at the computer because I kept being interrupted!
Tuesday, January 20, 2009
Planes and automobiles. (No Trains.)
Hey guys! We're heeeere. We got in right on time. 20 minutes early actually. We got to the hotel and checked in at about 5:30 here. It's about 8:30pm here now (1:30pm East coast time). We called Igor as soon as we got to the apartment and he said that Nastija has to go to school tomorrow for her last day (turn in books, say goodbyes, etc.), so we will go to her orphanage tomorrow afternoon at about 3:30 to pick her up. We'll have about a full day with her before court. We wish we had her here already or at least in the morning, but I understand the last day thing. It's not like they had a long notice to plan her last day of school!
The apartment we're staying in is fantastic. It's really nice and spacious. For those of you going to Estonia in the future - It's one of Romeo's apartments but not one on the website. They had emailed me pictures of it. It's called Ruutli. It's not in the same building as the other apartments in Old Town. It's around the corner, right next to the park where they have ice skating. It's an ideal spot for us. It's also right across the street from Pizza Americana, which we like a lot. We went there tonight after unpacking and getting cleaned up.
It's kind of bittersweet being here and seeing all the same places with went with the kids last year. It seems like so much has happened and changed since then. We wonder what this trip will be like with them. How different they might be after 8 months passing. We know they'll pretty much treat us the same way, but they can't help but get older - and you know how much Jason worries about that. I hope that when we go get Nastija, and then on Thursday when court is over and he stops stressing about that, and then on Friday when we get Katya and Roman, that he'll realize that the trip will be just as much fun as the last one. After that I will just pray we hear good news before we leave, or leaving will be even tougher this time, in some ways.
Tomorrow morning we're going to go grocery shopping and finish getting the apartment all ready so when Nastija comes it can be just fun and games for awhile. No need to work on cleaning or unpacking anymore.
I adjust to time changes very quickly so I'm feeling pretty good, but tired from not sleeping well on the airplane. Last time I didn't sleep at all because it was a full flight and there was NO room other than my chair. I could lean on Jason, or nothing, and that was it. This time it was a pretty empty flight so we had a row of three seats to ourselves. So I leaned on the window or spread out on the chair next to me. But even then I could not get comfortable. Either the armrest would keep falling down on my head, or my foot would fall asleep, or my neck would start hurting from being propped up so much higher than the rest of my body. I just don't sleep well if I'm not flat! I'm spoiled by sleeping in a bed all these years. So I watched "Baby Mama" and "Mamma Mia" on the headrest tv system. (Why did I choose movies that had to do with Mamas by the way?)
But then on the second leg (from Amsterdam to Tallinn, 2.5 hours) I was so exhausted that after I ate the not-so-yummy lunch they gave us and keeping away starvation for one more hour, I fell asleep in a regular sitting position, propping my head on one hand on the armrest. I NEVER can fall asleep that way. But I was so tired. I even slept through the most amount of talking I've ever heard go on during a plane ride. The people behind us spoke French loudly to each other and to the people across the isle from them the ENTIRE flight.
Anyway, that's all the news from here. More tomorrow, or as soon as I get time!
Love,
Molly
The apartment we're staying in is fantastic. It's really nice and spacious. For those of you going to Estonia in the future - It's one of Romeo's apartments but not one on the website. They had emailed me pictures of it. It's called Ruutli. It's not in the same building as the other apartments in Old Town. It's around the corner, right next to the park where they have ice skating. It's an ideal spot for us. It's also right across the street from Pizza Americana, which we like a lot. We went there tonight after unpacking and getting cleaned up.
It's kind of bittersweet being here and seeing all the same places with went with the kids last year. It seems like so much has happened and changed since then. We wonder what this trip will be like with them. How different they might be after 8 months passing. We know they'll pretty much treat us the same way, but they can't help but get older - and you know how much Jason worries about that. I hope that when we go get Nastija, and then on Thursday when court is over and he stops stressing about that, and then on Friday when we get Katya and Roman, that he'll realize that the trip will be just as much fun as the last one. After that I will just pray we hear good news before we leave, or leaving will be even tougher this time, in some ways.
Tomorrow morning we're going to go grocery shopping and finish getting the apartment all ready so when Nastija comes it can be just fun and games for awhile. No need to work on cleaning or unpacking anymore.
I adjust to time changes very quickly so I'm feeling pretty good, but tired from not sleeping well on the airplane. Last time I didn't sleep at all because it was a full flight and there was NO room other than my chair. I could lean on Jason, or nothing, and that was it. This time it was a pretty empty flight so we had a row of three seats to ourselves. So I leaned on the window or spread out on the chair next to me. But even then I could not get comfortable. Either the armrest would keep falling down on my head, or my foot would fall asleep, or my neck would start hurting from being propped up so much higher than the rest of my body. I just don't sleep well if I'm not flat! I'm spoiled by sleeping in a bed all these years. So I watched "Baby Mama" and "Mamma Mia" on the headrest tv system. (Why did I choose movies that had to do with Mamas by the way?)
But then on the second leg (from Amsterdam to Tallinn, 2.5 hours) I was so exhausted that after I ate the not-so-yummy lunch they gave us and keeping away starvation for one more hour, I fell asleep in a regular sitting position, propping my head on one hand on the armrest. I NEVER can fall asleep that way. But I was so tired. I even slept through the most amount of talking I've ever heard go on during a plane ride. The people behind us spoke French loudly to each other and to the people across the isle from them the ENTIRE flight.
Anyway, that's all the news from here. More tomorrow, or as soon as I get time!
Love,
Molly
Monday, January 19, 2009
I dropped a bomb on you, baby.
Hey all!
Now that family has been told on the phone, I can tell the rest of you. We have news! First of all I should apologize again to everyone for not telling anyone sooner. Jason insisted, and I didn't take much convincing, to wait to share good news until it was certain. After the delays and issues we've had with Katya and Roman's adoption, we didn't want to have another thing for family to be excited about and then disappointed about along with us.
The first part of the news is that we decided back in October to go ahead and pursue the adoption of another little girl who had become available. This is the same little girl we had met in Estonia last May when we were with the kids. As it turns out, she is Katya and Roman's first cousin and has lived in the same group with them for years. So they know and love each other. Because of that, and because of the fact that we didn't (and still don't) know how long it will take to get Katya and Roman home, and we didn't know if EVERYTHING in our adoption world would take 4 times longer than it should, we went ahead and started, figuring a head start on our next step to a big family can't possibly be insane. Right?
OK so now that we agree on that, I'll introduce you to her. Her name is Anastasija and goes by Nastija (pronounced NAH-stee-ah or NAH-stya). She is 9 years old, as of September 23rd. I'll try to post a picture of her on here later. She's a real cutie!
We decided to wait, as I said, until it was certain that we are getting her, to tell you all about her. Jason wanted to wait until we enter the US with her. But that would be just a little too much for everyone to take, I think, so I convinced him to tell everyone when we find out her court date. Then that would give us about a month before she comes home for everyone to learn about her.
As some of you already know, we did not end up getting a month notice. We got about a week. We found out late Tuesday and our court date is this coming Thursday afternoon the 22nd. We have to leave tonight! We couldn't believe how fast it came. I knew they were trying to get us a quick date because of the problems and delays we've had all along the way, but we didn't really expect it to happen that fast. So we are SOOOO excited.
I should mention, for clarity's sake, that she is not replacing the other kids. We will fight to get them home no matter what it takes. The kids, by the way, are ECSTATIC about us taking their cousin, even though she is coming home first. They have the best attitude about it. They are viewing it as a bonus that we get to visit them for a couple weeks while they wait for their documents to be resolved, and on top of that, their cousin gets to go to a good home. They also are happy that she will be their sister. They are disappointed, just as we are, that they can't come home at the same time. But they don't seem to be jealous of her at all. They are genuinely sweet and wonderful about it. We will continue to be watchful, though, of jealousy and things like that, though. We keep encouraging the kids that if we had it our way, they'd have been home with us a long time ago, and that we won't give up on them. To which they always reply that they know, they thank us, and tell us not to worry and not be sad. They say that if we are sad, they are sad.
Here are a couple of emails we got from the kids lately (Note: Thank you's to Grandma and Grandpa were because Kathy and Vinny sent with our last package a couple gifts for them):
From Roman...
From Katya:
Now that family has been told on the phone, I can tell the rest of you. We have news! First of all I should apologize again to everyone for not telling anyone sooner. Jason insisted, and I didn't take much convincing, to wait to share good news until it was certain. After the delays and issues we've had with Katya and Roman's adoption, we didn't want to have another thing for family to be excited about and then disappointed about along with us.
The first part of the news is that we decided back in October to go ahead and pursue the adoption of another little girl who had become available. This is the same little girl we had met in Estonia last May when we were with the kids. As it turns out, she is Katya and Roman's first cousin and has lived in the same group with them for years. So they know and love each other. Because of that, and because of the fact that we didn't (and still don't) know how long it will take to get Katya and Roman home, and we didn't know if EVERYTHING in our adoption world would take 4 times longer than it should, we went ahead and started, figuring a head start on our next step to a big family can't possibly be insane. Right?
OK so now that we agree on that, I'll introduce you to her. Her name is Anastasija and goes by Nastija (pronounced NAH-stee-ah or NAH-stya). She is 9 years old, as of September 23rd. I'll try to post a picture of her on here later. She's a real cutie!
We decided to wait, as I said, until it was certain that we are getting her, to tell you all about her. Jason wanted to wait until we enter the US with her. But that would be just a little too much for everyone to take, I think, so I convinced him to tell everyone when we find out her court date. Then that would give us about a month before she comes home for everyone to learn about her.
As some of you already know, we did not end up getting a month notice. We got about a week. We found out late Tuesday and our court date is this coming Thursday afternoon the 22nd. We have to leave tonight! We couldn't believe how fast it came. I knew they were trying to get us a quick date because of the problems and delays we've had all along the way, but we didn't really expect it to happen that fast. So we are SOOOO excited.
I should mention, for clarity's sake, that she is not replacing the other kids. We will fight to get them home no matter what it takes. The kids, by the way, are ECSTATIC about us taking their cousin, even though she is coming home first. They have the best attitude about it. They are viewing it as a bonus that we get to visit them for a couple weeks while they wait for their documents to be resolved, and on top of that, their cousin gets to go to a good home. They also are happy that she will be their sister. They are disappointed, just as we are, that they can't come home at the same time. But they don't seem to be jealous of her at all. They are genuinely sweet and wonderful about it. We will continue to be watchful, though, of jealousy and things like that, though. We keep encouraging the kids that if we had it our way, they'd have been home with us a long time ago, and that we won't give up on them. To which they always reply that they know, they thank us, and tell us not to worry and not be sad. They say that if we are sad, they are sad.
Here are a couple of emails we got from the kids lately (Note: Thank you's to Grandma and Grandpa were because Kathy and Vinny sent with our last package a couple gifts for them):
From Roman...
we are not going to be sad , just want sooner to leave with you , we so much want to go with you and we hope that you will take us with you to America and there everything going to be good. we got your parcel and I like your car very much thank you and thank you for all candies too. I want that court to be soon can you tell me exactly when its going to be? I want to leave so badly and be able to tell grandma and grandpa big thank you, huge thank you and that we love them a lot and want to meet them
good I love you very much , and all relatives I love very much , please tell them not to worry
we love them so much just as we love you very much
From Katya:
mom and dad I hope that Roman and I will be able to see you on 23rd and I want to be with you in hotel and Roman wants that too. we got letters from you I liked them very much, tell grandma and grandpa and all relatives that I love them very much and Roman loves them very much as well. I want to be be with you on 23rd and I want Nastija to be with us and so we can be a family for whole three weeks in the hotel I hope you will have enough time to buy tickets.
and I very hope that president of Russia will sign papers. Roman, Nastija and I going to write you, just wait .
I love you so much!!!!!!!!!!
Aren't they sweet?!
I gotta run, still have packing to do. Hope you enjoy the bomb being dropped on you. :)
Love,
Molly
Aren't they sweet?!
I gotta run, still have packing to do. Hope you enjoy the bomb being dropped on you. :)
Love,
Molly
Friday, January 16, 2009
Sasha waved goodbye
Sorry I haven't written! Been super busy!!! So here's part of an update. More news to write, but for now I'll just post about the rest of Sasha's visit, and I'll write a new blog post (hopefully I'll have time tomorrow) about other stuff.
We took Sasha to JFK yesterday. She didn't seem very sad, which was good for us - not too emotional. She with her friends from her orphanage and she waved bye after a long hug and kiss, and a lip playfully stuck out.
She has an older sister my age, so I think she viewed us basically like friends, or almost like siblings. She called us by our names, which helped us not get overly attached to someone who we cannot afford to adopt. She is a very sweet girl and was usually very easy for us to get along with. There were only a couple times where she gave us any mild trouble, and then it was just playfully giving us trouble about being quiet or going to sleep. There was one time where there was a misunderstanding and she got her feelings hurt, stomped off and started crying. We had to call the translator to get help. That was the only real challenge we had the whole time. She's an adorable kid and we'll miss her. We don't know if she'll be back in the summer or not. She said something that gave us the impression that she may be being adopted in Russia by someone. I don't know for sure though.
We took her to the dentist as required by the program. She had 4 cavities on her big teeth and several on the baby teeth that are left. AHH! She said she'd never been to the dentist. No kidding! The dentist said that she didn't have a lot of plaque, so the cavities are probably from her diet. Although she ate candy and ice cream as much as we would let her, like it is a rare treat in Russia. I don't know what they eat that has enough sugar to do that kind of damage to her teeth. But you could visibly see some tooth decay on one of her bottom teeth when she laughed. We tried to explain it to her, that she needs to take better care of her teeth, brushing them more often after eating. She didn't seem to take us very seriously. So there again was the only real issue we had - treating us like buddies and not really ever wanting to be serious. Every time we were serious, she'd playfully say "nooooooo" like "oh that's silly."
But anyway, we had a great time with her, and it was wonderful to have a kid in the house. It made things a lot easier the last 5 weeks. And I know she had a good time.
More later. Hopefully the pictures work this time. I tried to post them before and it kept failing.
Love,
Molly
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)