No new email from the kids yet this week. We think they might be at camp right now anyway. So we probably won't hear from them again for a little while.
Not really any news except that work is finally slowing down to a regular pace again. It was soooo busy around the holiday weekend with people going away and needing us to watch their dogs. Now we just have two dogs - one we're watching and one we're training. So it's more tolerable! We're both pioneering this month too so it's really busy with that also!
We found out today that the previous family who visited our kids is still having a fit that they were disqualified and are trying to fight it. They went over the agency's head to Estonia and it didn't work. It's the agency's job to accept or reject families... That's why they have the accreditation and stuff from the Estonian government. So there's nothing they can do, but it's still upsetting! It's kind of like finding out that a crazy ex-girlfriend is after your husband. You know it won't work, but you still wish they'd stop trying to break you up and steal your spouse!
I don't know why we can't get many breaks with the adoption process. We're really grateful for the things that have worked out - finding Estonia and finding the kids. We love them so much and the trouble is worth getting them home with us, but it seems like it's just our luck that our kids are the ones that another family is trying to fight over! It just adds to the stress during our wait.
Jason pointed out that we've already had like 4 things happen to us with the adoption process that "never happen". 1- having a home study that takes 9 months to get because our SW quit, 2- having our USCIS approval take 15 weeks to get total, part of that because of #3- the SW misspelling our name and setting us back with USCIS approval and 4- choosing kids who have had been previewed by another family that was later disqualified and still wanting our kids!!!
We're due a big break. A quick court date perhaps? PLEASE adoption universe?!?!
Maybe our big break is just the only one we've had all along - amazing kids who are perfect for us.
Love,
Molly
Tuesday, July 15, 2008
Wednesday, July 9, 2008
Typed too soon.
Last night two more emails came through that were sent at the same time as the one we received yesterday morning. One of them had a word we couldn't understand so we're not sure what it said. The other was in response to one of our emails that said "Make sure you are good and don't get into any trouble!" Their response was " привет унас все хорощо
мы вас любим!!!!!!!!" which means "Hi we are all good. We love you!!!"
So, naturally, that made us feel better. It was a tougher sentence to write, complete with a couple misspellings. But we still knew what it said, and meant that there was more effort to write something with substance than we initially thought they had made. And getting the "we love you" again is always nice. Much better than one email that just says "Yes". :)
Just wanted to share!
They are probably at camp again so we may not hear from them for a couple weeks. We'll see. Keep praying that we get that stinking court paper soon. That's what we need now!
Love,
Molly
мы вас любим!!!!!!!!" which means "Hi we are all good. We love you!!!"
So, naturally, that made us feel better. It was a tougher sentence to write, complete with a couple misspellings. But we still knew what it said, and meant that there was more effort to write something with substance than we initially thought they had made. And getting the "we love you" again is always nice. Much better than one email that just says "Yes". :)
Just wanted to share!
They are probably at camp again so we may not hear from them for a couple weeks. We'll see. Keep praying that we get that stinking court paper soon. That's what we need now!
Love,
Molly
Tuesday, July 8, 2008
Reassuringly unassured.
Not much going on lately... We got another email from the kids this morning, but it was only a one word answer (da = yes), in response to whether they liked the pictures we sent them from the trip. It can be a little disappointing at times that they don't say more in their emails, because they are capable of it, and we know they probably spend much of their internet time on limpa.ru website, posting comments at length to who-knows-who on there. Especially after the long letters we take the time to handwrite and send with a printed translation. Jason already worries that the kids won't be "the way they were" by the time we see them again, and the short emails make that worry worse. That they'll somehow get so much older than 4-6 months older, over the course of 4-6 months. Especially Katya, now being 12 years old. He's worried that by the time she gets here she will be less interested in family and more interested in telephones and parties. I don't think I discovered telephones and parties till I was a little older. And still, she has to learn English and make friends in order for that to happen. It seems, though, that even though there are valid bright sides to adopting older kids - we may already be upset that they are growing up so fast. And they aren't even here yet!
I don't worry really that they will be that much different when we see them. After all, their life's purpose over the last 5 years has been to join a family. I don't think that them not wanting to play tag and get piggy back rides anymore will be the adjustment we have to make, or that they have to make. My biggest concerns have to do with getting them used to the rules here. Like they won't be allowed on limpa.ru anymore. There are bad pictures on there, and mostly - we can't do our job as supervising what's going on on there because we can't read it! It's all Russian. They will not like, and not understand, that rule. I'm sure there will be times they think that "these parents are MEAN"... That's what I'm concerned about... They will have these very important rules enforced right from the start -before we can get them used to trusting that we know what's best and it's for their protection. I don't worry whether they will want to play UNO with their parents sometimes. I think the rules are important for their adjustment, but they won't understand them and we can't explain them that well at first.
But I guess that's why Jason and I work well together. We rarely worry about the same things.
Anyway, I am glad that we get emails from them at all. If they were younger we wouldn't hear that they were even alive and well because they would have no ability to contact us. And I also believe that it is more important for them to be reassured of how much we care about them, than for us to be reassured. They, after all, are the ones that have had to be accepted or rejected; and have been rejected more than accepted.
I very often think back to how I was at that age, and my relationship with my parents. As much as I am so proud of my parents and how they raised me, I'm sure that I got more reassurance from them of their love than I gave them. That is what makes me think that this is the job of the parent. To give more than I'll get back sometimes.
I'll keep you all posted on anything interesting that happens, of course. Stay tuned!
Love,
Molly
PS- I got to see Tabitha and Jeff yesterday!!! Woohoo! They were in NJ for the ASL district convention. They are doing pretty well. They, too, said that the kids look like they could be OUR kids. We don't see any resemblance, but take it as a compliment when we hear it!
I don't worry really that they will be that much different when we see them. After all, their life's purpose over the last 5 years has been to join a family. I don't think that them not wanting to play tag and get piggy back rides anymore will be the adjustment we have to make, or that they have to make. My biggest concerns have to do with getting them used to the rules here. Like they won't be allowed on limpa.ru anymore. There are bad pictures on there, and mostly - we can't do our job as supervising what's going on on there because we can't read it! It's all Russian. They will not like, and not understand, that rule. I'm sure there will be times they think that "these parents are MEAN"... That's what I'm concerned about... They will have these very important rules enforced right from the start -before we can get them used to trusting that we know what's best and it's for their protection. I don't worry whether they will want to play UNO with their parents sometimes. I think the rules are important for their adjustment, but they won't understand them and we can't explain them that well at first.
But I guess that's why Jason and I work well together. We rarely worry about the same things.
Anyway, I am glad that we get emails from them at all. If they were younger we wouldn't hear that they were even alive and well because they would have no ability to contact us. And I also believe that it is more important for them to be reassured of how much we care about them, than for us to be reassured. They, after all, are the ones that have had to be accepted or rejected; and have been rejected more than accepted.
I very often think back to how I was at that age, and my relationship with my parents. As much as I am so proud of my parents and how they raised me, I'm sure that I got more reassurance from them of their love than I gave them. That is what makes me think that this is the job of the parent. To give more than I'll get back sometimes.
I'll keep you all posted on anything interesting that happens, of course. Stay tuned!
Love,
Molly
PS- I got to see Tabitha and Jeff yesterday!!! Woohoo! They were in NJ for the ASL district convention. They are doing pretty well. They, too, said that the kids look like they could be OUR kids. We don't see any resemblance, but take it as a compliment when we hear it!
Monday, June 30, 2008
Taskuem? OH! тоскуем!!
We got an email from the kids this morning. We told them in our last email that we want them to say more, even if they write in Russian. This email was written with a mixture of Russian and phonetic Russian with English letters (which they use on their online programs - they type in English letters that correspond to Russian letters, and Russian readers would know what letters they mean) - so it took a few minutes to figure out what it said, but it was really nice to get something more than 4 words!
They answered our questions about how they are (horoso = хорошо = good), if they got the package we sent with their new shoes (да), and finally "mq tozi taskuem bez vas mq vas love!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" which says "we also grieve without you, we you love!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
When we write "we miss you", it translates "we grieve without you". So that's where that came from.
Other than that, there's no news. We will soon be sending them more pictures, a digital watch for each of them (they liked to wear our watches when we were there), and letters. I'll keep you all posted!
Love,
Molly
They answered our questions about how they are (horoso = хорошо = good), if they got the package we sent with their new shoes (да), and finally "mq tozi taskuem bez vas mq vas love!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" which says "we also grieve without you, we you love!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
When we write "we miss you", it translates "we grieve without you". So that's where that came from.
Other than that, there's no news. We will soon be sending them more pictures, a digital watch for each of them (they liked to wear our watches when we were there), and letters. I'll keep you all posted!
Love,
Molly
Sunday, June 22, 2008
No news is no news.
Hi everyone! There isn't any news to report. We're waiting for our court documents to arrive via email through the agency. Those documents are the ones where we put down their new middle names and submit them to the court, at which point we wait for a court date to be assigned. We will hear about court date 2-4 weeks before it occurs. We keep hearing that it's "possible" to get a court date over the summer, even though they are "closed". So we keep hoping and praying that we will get the soonest possible court date. We are so anxious to get them home. It's just terrible!!!
No more new contact from the kids. We hope we'll get a letter from them soon. We sent a letter to a family in Texas that is adopting their friends from the same group at the end of the month. They will carry the letters over to the kids for us.
That's all for now. Everyone keep hoping on our behalf that things will go fast! I will report any news as we receive it.
Love,
Molly
No more new contact from the kids. We hope we'll get a letter from them soon. We sent a letter to a family in Texas that is adopting their friends from the same group at the end of the month. They will carry the letters over to the kids for us.
That's all for now. Everyone keep hoping on our behalf that things will go fast! I will report any news as we receive it.
Love,
Molly
Friday, June 13, 2008
"Hai"
We got an email back from Katya and Roman today. It said, simply "we love you. hai!" "Hai" is how Katya writes "hi". We wrote back to ask if they got the package we sent and haven't gotten a response yet. I think they get to check email briefly about once a week when they aren't at camp. So we hope to hear from them again before they go to their next camp in a couple weeks.
A couple of girls in their group are being adopted at the end of the month. Their court date is June 26th. We're mailing letters for the adoptive parents to carry over to our kids while they are in Tallinn. They should see them when they go to the orphanage. Will save a little money that way and then we'll get confirmation that they receive it!
Just thought you'd like to know we heard from them. It makes the waiting a little easier to know they remember us (lol) and they are ok. :)
Love,
Molly
A couple of girls in their group are being adopted at the end of the month. Their court date is June 26th. We're mailing letters for the adoptive parents to carry over to our kids while they are in Tallinn. They should see them when they go to the orphanage. Will save a little money that way and then we'll get confirmation that they receive it!
Just thought you'd like to know we heard from them. It makes the waiting a little easier to know they remember us (lol) and they are ok. :)
Love,
Molly
Tuesday, June 10, 2008
Contact
Everyone is asking us if we've had any contact with the kids. We sent them a photo album with the pictures from the trip, a pair of shoes each, and some Orbit gum (which they often asked for while we were there... "Or-beeeet, pleeeeease?"). We also called them a couple days after we got back, but that seemed pretty much useless because they wouldn't use their English, and though they understood us, all they said was "mm hmm" to everything. LOL We think there were people listening to them and they might have been bashful. Someone picked up another phone while I was talking to Katya, and I asked who that was (in Russian) and she said (in English), "group." Meaning someone in another group in the orphanage picked up the phone to use it and heard that it was being used already.
Jason said to Katya, "Learn more English so you will say more than 'mm hmm'!" And she responded with an emphatic "uh uhh!!" Funny how we can joke around with each other with so little language skills being employed!
We've also sent her emails but they are at one of their summer camps right now so she hasn't checked them yet. I hope we get letters or emails from them. The wait is not getting any easier. We feel like we're losing valuable time. We don't know how we're going to handle things they have to learn before they go to school. There is so much we want to explain to them, and they're not going to have much time before they get shoved into the culture and lifestyle here. We'll get by somehow, I guess!
All for now. Nothing else new going on. Just waiting!!
Anyone who wants to write anything to the kids, either for their albums for when they get home, or for an email, feel free to email it to me (or write it on paper if you want it to be for their books). I can translate it and keep it for them or send it to them. :)
Love,
Molly
Jason said to Katya, "Learn more English so you will say more than 'mm hmm'!" And she responded with an emphatic "uh uhh!!" Funny how we can joke around with each other with so little language skills being employed!
We've also sent her emails but they are at one of their summer camps right now so she hasn't checked them yet. I hope we get letters or emails from them. The wait is not getting any easier. We feel like we're losing valuable time. We don't know how we're going to handle things they have to learn before they go to school. There is so much we want to explain to them, and they're not going to have much time before they get shoved into the culture and lifestyle here. We'll get by somehow, I guess!
All for now. Nothing else new going on. Just waiting!!
Anyone who wants to write anything to the kids, either for their albums for when they get home, or for an email, feel free to email it to me (or write it on paper if you want it to be for their books). I can translate it and keep it for them or send it to them. :)
Love,
Molly
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